True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize