If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
