More tranny stories later!
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize
