He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
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The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
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I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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