and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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