Dude my mom stole all your condoms
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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