Your tits are I can't wait for
kristin has been a bad kristin
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
