Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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