is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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