he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
