I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize