your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
