Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize