Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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