Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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