I must be too annoying 4 u.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize
