Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
