It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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