I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
