hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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