its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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