Non-Jews are for practice
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Randomize
