Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
