do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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