hell yes lets make some ravioli
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Randomize
