Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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