OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
