is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
