Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
