actually, I'm a sock model
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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