i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
