physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
