I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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