you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
