I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
