end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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