I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize