It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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