I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
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