omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
kristin has been a bad kristin
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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