his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
