I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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