if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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