I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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