What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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