Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
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