And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
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