literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize