every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Randomize
