Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
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the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
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Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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