I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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